The most evil word of evil words.

Why I say that? Because I figured out that different people have the most evil expectations of my being.

Some do think I am the cutest little fellah on earth and I should behave like this… respectively my father’s family believe that to be true and reacts shocked when I act out of that role they made up in their heads. Proof: I had quite the letter traffic between my grandma and I until I wrote something which wasn’t in favor of my father and it was the last letter since January.

Others think I’m the same as I was years ago… literally years. I got back into contact with friends and school mates over the last few months and their expectations about my personality seems to be off of what they get now. Quite confusing and for myself frustrating to tell them “sorry, that’s not me anymore, get over it”. For a few that works, others need more time, but that’s fine – I didn’t change over night as well.

So there’s also that fraction of people who just (randomly) fall in love with me… or at least with the picture of how I should be and behave in their heads… and don’t get over that their expectation isn’t reality. Gosh, I had so many fights in the last few weeks – if I wouldn’t have more important problems and issues at my hand right now I would’ve gone nuts.

Expectations… a really weird topic to be honest. Of course I have some expectations for myself as well, but not as in “you should be like this or that” more like “You want to reach goal x”. And usually I make it. Somehow, but I do. The easiest way of not getting too depressed.
On the other hand I think some people need expectations about someone to make it through life… even so if it’s misplaced, but well. I don’t say I understand this – I never did expect anything from anyone except myself and thank goodness I kept up with that – I just want to say that feeling the pressure of expectations really sucks.


Review: Brave Story

First released as a novel and manga, there’s also a movie by the name of “Brave Story”.

Mitani Wataru and his friend are playing in a building that should be destroyed soon, as there’s the rumor of a ghost in the building. While his friend runs away in fear, Wataru sees a boy in the building and follows him to discover a floating door. When his friend returns the door is gone. The next day Wataru meets the boy in school and finds out that his name is Ashikawa Mitsuru. After school he finds his dad in front of his home and hears that this parents are going to divorce. Wataru runs away upset and enters the building to find out that Mitsuru gets bullied by older pupils of his school. Mitsuru uses magic to frighten the boys and both Mitsuru and Wataru get away. Mitsuru tells Wataru about the door to another world and that he will go there to change his destiny. Wataru finds that unbelievable and returns home, where he finds his mother collapsed on the floor. Worried about his mother, Wataru decides to enter the door to another world to get his chance to change his fate by making a wish to the Goddess of Fortune.

He hears a strange voice of a girl telling him that he will get tested and finds himself in a cave, where he gets asked if he wants Happiness, Strength, Wisdom or Courage. He chooses all, the test begins and starts as a Hero Apprentice. Wataru obtains a red gem and gets send out for a journey to find the other four gems. He meets Kee Keema, a lizard of the water tribe, that brings him to the next city. Wataru sees Mitsuru and follows him, but looses his track. Instead he ends up in a circus and gets arrested for the theft of a baby dragon by the Highlanders, an organization of Justice. While his name gets cleared he agrees on finding the real culprit and obtains his second gem. He joins the Highlanders. The circus girl Meena and the baby dragon join Wataru and Kee Keema on their journey.

Wataru soon gets to know that Mitsuru destroys everything in his path to obtain the gems, but still believes that Mitsuru has a reason for doing all these bad things.
While the empires wage war against each other Wataru hears that Mitsuru will soon obtain the dark gem which seals demons into the underworld and rides on the back of the baby dragon’s father to stop him from doing something really terrible. He finds Mitsuru and tries to convince him, but Mitsuru’s mind is set on getting his parents and little sister back, so he takes the dark gem and releases the demons.
Wataru follows Mitsuru into the Tower and meets his own dark side that battles with him for the reason why he started the journey. Wataru accepts his dark self, but fails to stop Mitsuru from killing his dark self. Mitsuru dies in the arms of Wataru.
The girl with the voice he heard all along appears in front of him and tells him to wish for the death of the Goddess to obtain the title of God for himself. Wataru denies that decision and kills the bad spirit of the girl. The Goddess appears in front of him and asks him for his wish. Wataru wishes for the disappearance of the demons while being aware of that this won’t change anything in his world.

He returns to his own world, where things go better with his mom, but also finds out that a guy named Ashikawa Mitsuru isn’t known by his friend. When they enter the school he sees a familiar little girl and recognizes Mitsuru’s voice.

Conclusion: I wanted to smack Mitsuru -_- really badly. Until he died, than I was like “Q_Q NUUUUH”… the story was really nice and balanced up to the end, I also would’ve never thought the girl might end up as an ugly toad *lol* and I loved the baby dragon >_<‘ (even if I don’t like pink dragons) kewtness!

Review: Brave StoryDirected by: Koichi Chigira
Produced by: Daisuke Sekiguchi, Hiroyoshi Koiwai, Koji Kajita
Studio: Gonzo
Release Date: 8th of July, 2006

Review: Unico (The Fantastic Adventures Of Unico)

I was watching the movie Unico yesterday evening. The english title is: The Fantastic Adventures Of Unico.

The movie is about the small unicorn Unico with white fur and a red mane that possesses a special power: Everywhere Unico goes, the people will remain happy. This power is a threat to the gods and they decide to steal Unico away from his mother and bring him to the Hill of Oblivion so no one ever sees Unico again and could gain happyness without the necessary effort.
The gods order the West Wind to deliver Unico, but as the wind is a kind spirit she can’t do as she got told and leaves Unico on a misty dark island. When Unico awakes he discovers he’s far away from home and feels lonely. He starts to search for other life on the island and meets the devil of solitude statue, who freaks out when seeing the unicorn baby and throws lightning in the attempt to get rid of Unico. One of the lightnings breaks a solid stone column that smashes the statue and Unico discovers the devil’s son Beezel (which gets called Akuma-kun through the whole movie). Unico tries to befriend Akuma-kun, but he only wants to be friends when Unico gives him  his horn. Unico denies at first, afraid of losing his powers, but hands the horn to Akuma-kun for one day in exchange for the little devil to be his friend in that time. Akuma-kun shows how devils play and Unico gets afraid of the rough play and falls into the sea. Unico begs for his life, but Akuma-kun detests water and decides to take a nap, but he gets bored and decide to end the day of the exchange and dives into the water to rescue Unico. Akuma-kun returns the horn to Unico and Unico transforms into a beautiful big unicorn (so I’d say it’s a Pegacorn as it has wings and a horn) and saves Akuma-kun from drowning and also gives him his own horn.
The two of them play around and the gods find out about what happened on the island and send the Night Wind to bring Unico to the Hill of Oblivion.

Unico finds himself in a beautiful forest and hears a voice singing a nice song. He wants to find out who the singer is and lands in the basket of Chao (Katy) by accident. Chao is an abandoned kitten and wants to become a witch, but her biggest wish is to become a human girl. They float across the river in the basket and find an old house in the forest, where an old woman lives and takes care of them. Chao wishes hard to become a girl and Unico grants that wish with his powers. At first Chao helps the old lady, but then decides to idle around. Unico uses his powers again to turn her back into a kitten. Chao regrets that she wasn’t of any help for the old lady and tries to help her in her kitten form, when Unico returns her back into human form so she can be there for the old lady again. While Chao sings her song, the Danshaku (Baron De Ghost) discovers her and asks her to come to his castle the next night to sing for him. She isn’t allowed to tell anyone else and despite Unico’s warning about the forest feeling weird, she heads out to the Danshaku’s place. Unico runs to save her, but fails.

Akuma-kun, all alone on his island wants to see Unico again and asks the West Wind to take him to Unico’s place. The Night Wind follows the West Wind and tries to stop her from rushing to Unico’s side, but the West Wind escapes into the dawn where the Night Wind can’t follow.

Akuma-kun and the West Wind find Unico, who runs off to help Chao. Akuma-kun follows Unico and they discover the Danshaku’s evil side. Unico once again transforms into the winged unicorn and defeats the lord. Chao runs off to the old woman and tells her about what happened, when she gets told that Unico isn’t allowed to remain at one place for too long. Akuma-kun swears to find Unico once again as they became friends.

Conclusion: Such a sweet movie. So it’s for small children the drawings reminded me of “The Last Unicorn”. I enjoyed the movie really much. So this movie was made when I wasn’t even born, it bests a lot of other movies when it comes down to storyline and music.

Review: Unico (The Fantastic Adventures Of Unico)Directed by: Toshio Hirata
Produced by: Shintaro Tsuji
Studio: Madhouse
Release Date: 14th of March, 1981

Today’s Special Kyudo Training

It was my first Sunday training – hooray. And it was special! Nearly as special as this frog \(^0^)/

Today's Special Kyudo Training(frog prince statue in sensei’s garden)

I got picked up at 9:15am at Heemstede-Aerdenhout station and we drove to Kyudo training, which starts at 10am. We were only five people and got introduced to the Japanese visitors by our sensei. I didn’t knew all senseis from the Netherlands were present today, but it was really nice to see them all again (usually I only meet them for exams or new year’s shooting). We were left alone – as the senseis went to Haarlem for the flower parade – and started our training. After we finished our free training at 12pm, we had lunch at the terrace of our sensei and bathed in the warm spring sun.

Our sensei returned with the visitors around 2pm and we watched a demonstration of Iaido.

We introduced ourselves to my sensei’s sensei and participated in mato-sharei from highest to lowest ranks (means I was omai (lead) of the last group as I was lowest in rank present today… and also the only one with a kyu grade – all others were Dan level).

After that we got explanations of the sensei what we should correct and why we should correct it, which was really interesting. He then corrected us in training before he did Makiwara-sharei.

At 6pm we stopped the training and had some food and sake before leaving the dojo at 7pm. It was a really long day in the dojo, but it was interesting, I learned a lot of things (while I got some bruises on my left hand) and I look forward to Thursday’s training to see what my sensei says about the advice I received to change bow weight from 12 to 10 kg… (I don’t really want to go lower again and probably I was bad with my 12kg after shooting 30 arrows on that day *lol*)

Today's Special Kyudo Training


This one was a fun shot… this duck visited the dojo last Thursday already, but today he was walking all the way from the middle towards the target area… funny duck~

Today's Special Kyudo Training

Prohibition Of Alcohol

Active since 15th of April, 2013 until the 20th of October, 2013 it is not allowed to consume alcohol around the apartment block (where my apartment is located in) and the park area.

It would sound funny, if the reason behind this wouldn’t be actually pretty sad:
Youngsters who use the gathering point near the block and under the train bridge to meet and consume alcohol (even the sorts they’re not allowed to consume) & drugs and then get on their scooters to drive up and down the street while screaming and laughing.
As my apartment is faced to the street I had some nights over the last 2 months when I wished there would be a selective bomb for these idiots… I never complained to someone about it, I just felt the immediate urge to bomb holes in their brains.

Yesterday after training I found a quite amusing writing that due to complaints of the people, the area is now a “no alcohol” zone. Hooray. Fascinating.
The letter also said that the police will patrol the area for people with alcohol.

The weekend will show, if this prohibition thing works out as it should.

Kyudo Training #2

How many posts do I have like this already? Oh yeah, WordPress told me: that’s number 2…rofl
I’m not really productive with titles about my training… obviously.

Anyhow… yesterday’s training was… intense. Really. I guess that’s due to the visit of my sensei’s senseis on Sunday and they want us to shine, not talking about sparkle. Anyhow… my muscles hurt already from doing Wii Fit Plus, but training boost my aches up by at least 30%. I still think that’s fine – I had fun and that’s what training should be about, right? (Why do I sound like a masochist…)

On a side note I had some nice talks with my senpais – one about my working future… so now I got some courage for an application I was unable to decide to apply or not apply before that talk. I really am grateful for these people as they help my mental state quite a lot.

So besides my hand postures I also need to pay attentio on my shoulders and body… weeeh~

And for the first time ever I was fixing my string on my own without any help of senpais or sensei *happy dance* However it came off – I don’t have a clue. I was shooting just fine last week and this week when unwrapping the bow… it somehow was off…tss. Sensei was looking at me like “It was little men getting it off?” … 😦 no of course it was my shooting, but it wasn’t looking like this last week >_< (who am I making excuses to?)

It was also quite fun that one of my senpais and I discovered our Tabi to be dirty last week and said we would wash them… and still didn’t do it. *roflmao* (well, mine are drying at the moment)

Next training session: Sunday, 10am. Special training at 2pm. Hooray~ hopefully I’ll get some nice pictures  (but not to put them online) as I’m allowed to bring my camera with me… maybe this time some new pictures of myself.